These past few months I been struggling with money issues,problems with some people and also depression. It's been a hard few months. I find myself thinking about my grandma every day now and what it would be like if my grandma was still here. I have yet to tell you guys about my grandmother. She was an amazing women. Born on Valentines day. She had a heart of gold. Took care of me when I was a new born. Was always there for me and my brothers growing up. We was so close. I Would see her every weekend. Her house was my second home in Brooklyn NY. Where she was born and raised.
She had 2 daughters one is my mother and the other died when she was in her 20's.
My grandma was diagnoised with breast cancer. I didn't think it was as serious.I thought my grandmother is the strongest person in the world. She'll get through this. She been through so much and got through all of that. Her daughter dying,Her husband dying from stomach cancer. She could handle anything that came her way. Or so I thought. What I didn't know was the cancer had spread to her liver and they found it way to late. Even though my grandma was so healthy,Got mamagrams when she was suppose to and was so strong. She wasn't strong enough to beat this illness. The doctors gave her 3 months to live. She ended up living 3 long happy years. My grandma passed away on March 5th 2005 with me,My brothers,My mom,My dad,My aunt(her sister) all by her side. I layed with her for over an hour when she passed. Just crying on her stomach wishing she would come back.But nothing was going to bring her back. My full of life caring grandmother was now a beautiful angel in heaven.
It's been 4 years since she has passed and not a day goes by where I don't still think about her and all the times we spent in the past,Every holiday passes and I wonder. What would we do with my grandma for this holiday. Every weekend passes and I wonder. What would we have done this weekend together if she was still alive and every day passes and I wonder what it would of been like if she was still here with us. I don't know why god took her from me but all I know is she is waiting at the gate for me when he decides to take me under his wing and that's when ill once again have that smile on my face like everytime my mother would tell me we are going to grandma's house. But until then ill cherish all the moments we did get to spend together and take in everything she has told me before she passed and thank god for the times he let me spend with her even though it hurts so bad that I can't spend anymore days with her. Until I see her again ill always remember all the times we spent and everything she taught me and she will always be my hero.
